Hotarubi no Taraiaru
by TheLooneyBin
Summary: Three years after Gin's tragic end, Hotaru receives word from the librarian she works with of an ancient trial of the Mountain God...
1. Chapter 1

It was a peaceful day in my uncle's city. The streets were not busy and time seemed to crawl by, not like I minded, not like I had much else to do. I reached up and stacked another book neatly on the shelf of the library I'd taken to working at. It was pleasantly quiet on the weekdays, little to no customers. The pay wasn't great but the work i did was minimal and the woman who ran the place always cheered me up when I was down. I trailed my finger along the spine of one of the books I was holding, simply allowing the simple texture of the cover to grace my skin.

I heard the faint creak of the Library's office door opening and turned to see Ms. Shuzima walking out of her office. I turned to greet her with a smile.

"Good morning Ms. Shuzima." I said.

She smiled in response and looked at the book I had been fingering.

"Oh, an interesting topic, that one." she said with another one of her smiles that made me feel as if I was at my grandmother's house.

I looked down and saw the title my finger had been brushing against. _The legends of the Mountain God._ Was written in fine, gilded print along the spine of the hardcover. I blushed and tried to stutter off a response but was stopped short by the chuckles of the librarian.

"Dear child, have you ever heard of the legend of the Mountain God?" she asked.

"Yes ma'am, I'm quite familiar with the mountain god and his Yokai." I said with another blush.

I'd moved on from Gin. Of course I never forgot about him, but I did eventually get over the hurt. It was still a sensitive topic reserved for me only.

"Have you ever heard of the Hotarubi no Toraiaru?" she asked.

I was genuinely stumped, so I produced a shake of the head and polite no ma'am before she continued on.

"Ah yes, the Hotarubi no Toraiaru, the Trial of the firefly's light. It is said that any who can make it through this trial will be granted three wishes, though no one has ever actually made it. They say it takes a heart of stone and a will of steel to complete, but eh, who knows, it is only a myth." she said, before hobbling away to leave me standing in the aisle, deep in thought.

There was a large chance that this was nothing more than another piece of folklore, but if it was real… My thoughts drifted to Gin, bringing up a new batch of emotions and unwanted nostalgia. I did like to reminisce but the memories reminiscing on the topic of bringing Gin back didn't flow so smoothly with my emotional stability. I was overjoyed at the opportunity, but also terrified of even attempting. I knew the mountain God was there, I'd witnessed first-hand his doings. I looked down at the small stack of books in my arms and glanced at my watch. It had been nearly 2 hours! I went about putting away the books hastily. Though it seemed no one came in here often, the books seemed to move from their shelves on free will.

As I finished placing the second to last book on the shelf I kept the one in my arms and walked off to find Ms. Shuzima. I walked more rapidly than I normally did and opened the door to her office. I slowed and walked up to the chair in front of her desk and placed the book in my lap. She looked up the bridge of her nose at me, removing her glasses and sitting up to smile at me, as she always did.

"Yes?" she asked.

Almost rudely I spat out, "Tell me more about Hotarubi no Toraiaru."

She leant back and motioned for the book. I handed it to her and she replaced her glasses and proceeded to search through the book's pages. I didn't show it on my face, or at least I hope I didn't, but my heart was pounding away at my ribcage and I could hardly breathe through the squeezing tension in my chest as I thought of these rials and of… him.

Her voice startled me back to reality, "Ah, here we are. Hotarubi no Toraiaru. The trial set forth by the mountain God, Öyamatsumi, to find the strongest of heart, soul and mind. Legend tells of the trial beginning at the Kamishikimi Kumanoimasu Shrine, in the forest of the mountain God. You are required to bring nothing but the bare minimums and a blood offering to begin the trial. The trial is split into five smaller trials, the trial of the never ending trail, the trial of stability, the trial of intent, the trial of purity and the final trial. No one has ever been recorded to finish the trials." she said, gently closing the book and returning it to my hands.

Before I had time to think I'd grabbed the book, placed it on the table outside the door and rushed to the exit. Bursting out of the wooden double doors I hit the ground running on the street. I had to return home before uncle did, and pack what I needed. It would worry him to death but it would be worth it in the end. Or would it? Whether it was real or not I would have to try now. Before I knew it I was back. I jumped up the stairs to the door and flung the door open. Rushing to the bedroom I grabbed a small rucksack and a pair of uncle's boots, throwing them onto my feet. They were a bit loose but I'm sure it would be fine. Running to my personal room I sent things flying across the room, throwing things to and fro, grabbing only what was necessary. Without even thinking I grabbed Gin's mask and held it in my hands. I ran to the kitchen now and threw in a few non-perishables and a small, dagger like blade. I grabbed a bottle of water and bust out the back door, still zipping up the pack's pockets.

My place on my school's cross country team would now come in handy. I had joined to be able to be closer to the forests more often. I could set a nice pace and enjoy the simpler things in life. My feet hit dirt and I could feel the weight of the boots even now. I kept running, all the way to the shrine I knew so well by now. As I tore up the stairs my memories flashed back to the first day I'd met Gin, the small stick in my hand, grabbed on the other end by Gin. I smiled as my pace slowed, approaching the large stone columns.

This was the first time I' returned here since that night three years ago. The foliage around me seemed filled with life, as if every leaf and every branch on every tree was speaking to me, the whispers on the wind trying to convey to me a message. I turned to look to my right slowly, breathing the run off. The leaves rustled in the gentle breeze. I turned to my left and saw the same black figure I'd seen when I was six, Gin's friend.

"Child, you came back. There is nothing for you here." he said in his ghostly presence.

"You are wrong, I have a new purpose in coming here." I responded.

The figure looked confused, "Now, what at all may that be?"

"I wish to participate in the trial of firefly's light." I stated confidently.

He chuckled a bit, looking a bit more sinister than before, "I do not think you know what you are speaking of. No one has ever completed the trial. They were all searching for their three wishes and all the riches that came with them."

"Kitsune Yokai, I am not searching from three wishes, nor am I searching for riches. I only have one wish to fulfill, and I refuse to give up on the possibility of such a wish."

The spirit molded from it's black and clouded form to that of a fox, trotting up to me, "You may be more ready for the task at hand than I initially thought, forgive me." he said with the best bow a fox could give.

I crouched down and rubbed behind his ears, his head pushing against my hand. I chuckled a bit and took off my pack, setting it on the ground.

"Would you like to come with me?" I asked.

"Child I would come with you whether you asked or not, but I don not need a ride." he said, his form shifting once again to that of a shadow and disappearing into the trees.

I sighed and picked up the pack once again. I walked up to the stone columns and looked upwards at the beam overhead. I closed my eyes and willed the mountain God upon me to accept my challenge.

 _You asked for me, young one, and here I am._

Boomed a bellowing voice which seemed almost omnipresent.

I assumed this was the mountain God, "Öyamatsumi, I have come to partake in your trials." I said with false confidence in my voice, the voice that sounded more of thunder than of voices frightened me, but I wouldn't let that seep through.

 _Baka! No one has ever passed my trials._

I nodded, "I know, but I am here to try." I responded.

 _Very well, the blood offering, and you may begin your first trial._

The voice boomed once more,and then, it suddenly felt as if a large load of weight simply vanished from the middle of the forest. I reached around and grabbed the knife from one of the side pockets on the pack and held it in my left hand. I knelt to the ground and pressed the blade against my left thumb until the blood dripped onto the blade. I winced when the small blade pierced the skin but I did not let that stop me. I stuck my thumb in my mouth and tapped the blade of the knife against the concrete, letting a drop of my blood seep into the cracks.

I looked around for a boom of thunder, or some sort of sign, but none came. When I stood and went to take a step forward i was almost scared out of my wits when the same voice boomed a final time.

 _You may begin._


	2. Chapter 2

I tensed, hearing those was no turning back now. It was real, all of it. The trial was real, and the possibility of getting Gin back was real too. I looked down at his mask that I still held in my hands, looking upon the worn and slightly scratched white surface. I pulled the mask up to my own face and hugged it close, taking a deep breath before flipping the mask over in my hands and placing it upon my own face. I'd worn the mask before of course, but every time I put it on it felt like seeing him again. It smelled of him, it looked of him, it made me feel of him. It was time to go get him.

I started down the trail jogging, but quickly resorting to a well paced walk. I realized about 200 metres into my run that running uphill with boots and a backpack was going to be a bit difficult. I thought back to what Ms. Shuzima said about the first trial, the trial of the never ending trail. It seemed pretty self explanatory, though I didn't like the sound of it.

It was only several hours into the walk that I realized how much I really didn't like it. I had been walking for hours, I could tell by how much the sun had fallen, the bottom of the floating yellow orb touching the valley in between two of Öyamatsumi's mountains. I wiped away the beads of sweat dotting my brow and stared down the path that seemed to wind around corners that came out of nowhere. I was always going up but I almost saw no difference in the altitude that I started at. I sighed in frustration, exhaustion, and a bit of bitterness. I wiped my hair from where it stuck to my forehead and forced my burning legs to take another step forward, and then one more, and one more, and one more…

I was really becoming frustrated now. It was nearly night time now, and the summer air was not uncomfortable at least, but a bit more humid than I'd like. I had to rest now, I couldn't stand the burn that walking up this hill had caused any longer. There were trees all around me before, but it seemed like now that I wanted to rest they all disappeared when I followed the path out onto the wayside of the mountain, onto a rocky outcropping that was implanted into the surface of this ancient mount. I sat down on the side of the path, leaning into the rocky wall on the left side of it. I wasn't out of breath from walking, but my calves felt like they were being eaten away. I slipped off my pack and reached in for the bottle of water, opening it and drinking greedily, suddenly wishing I'd brought more.

I placed the empty bottle back into the bag and brought out a small granola bar I'd thrown in, unwrapping it and being sure to throw every piece of trash I had back into my pack. I respected this forest more than I respected some of the people I knew, though of course now I didn't really know that many people. I thought back to my life at home, all of the friends I used to have. I wasn't that concerned with friends anymore, and I slowly just sort of drifted apart from everyone. I'd lost the only friend that really mattered to me, so now most of my days were spent running, struggling to pass my classes, or staring out of windows. That was a term my mother had coined for me.

"Hotaru stop just staring out of windows and do your homework." she would always say.

I chuckled through my mouthful of oats and took another bite.

 _Boom_

I closed my eyes and cursed internally. The sound of thunder. I stood and looked around, seeing the grey clouds that I'd failed to notice in the low evening light which was now nearly gone, leaving the world around me tinted a strange purple. I hefted my pack onto my back and flipped the mask back down over my face, jogging around the next bend in the path until i came to the next cluster of trees.

No sooner had i sat under the protection of a tree had it started to rain. Luckily for me this was no drizzle, this was a monsoon. I pushed my pack over my head and felt the water soak through my clothes under the very shoddy protection of these trees, that is, until the rain stopped beating against my pack, and stopped soaking though my jeans. I could see the rain falling all around me, and hear it beating against a surface above my head. I looked up to see a red canopy over my head. Kasa Tsukumagami, the umbrella spirit. I smiled to myself and tucked myself under the protection of this kind spirit whom was a friend of Gin's. The spirit did not speak, but simply sat.

I thought for a moment and pulled my water bottle out of the pack and stuck it out into the rain, watching as in mere minutes it was filled to the brim. I took it back, screwed to top on, and leaned my head back against the slick bar of the tree. Not minding the little bit of wet I got.

I must had drifted off because I awoke in the morning, my legs screaming out in retaliation of being stretched out. The umbrella spirit was gone, my clothes still a bit wet but drier than they would have been were it not for that helpful little umbrella.

I pushed myself up from the ground and continued on the path, getting my legs stretched out for the long walk ahead.

Or so I thought.

 _Good Hotaru, you're doing well._

Came the voice I'd come to know as the Mountain God.

"So quickly?" I questioned.

 _Child, whenever is the first stretch of a run the hardest?_

He reasoned.

To his question, I had no answer, and so I continued to walk. I heard nothing else from him, and so I assumed the trial cont-

"Hotaru." I knew that voice.

That was the voice of the silver haired boy who's saved me so long ago, back when I was merely six. I said nothing in return, simply stopping in my tracks, not knowing of what I'd heard was even real.

"Hotaru." Came his voice again.

I spun on my heel to face what I knew for certain was Gin, tears already brimming my eyes. I spun and expected to find him standing there with that stupid grin slapped on his face that just made me want to glomp him.

The only problem was, he wasn't. I bit back the tears and brushed it off as my overactive imagination again. I turned and continued to walk, wiping tears from my eyes with the mask moved atop my head.

"Hotaru!" I was positive I'd heard him this time.

I immediately whirled and caught myself letting a single tear fall, truly having hope that I simply hadn't seen him. But yet again he wasn't there. I was truly beginning to hurt from these tricks. I brushed away the tear and turned again, continuing walking.

"Hotaru!" I didn't turn around.

"Come on Hotaru don't be like that." Tears were forcing their way to the corners of my eyes but I suppressed them, but only barely.

"Hotaru, I'm sorry." I felt a hand land on my shoulder.

That broke me. The fact that the Mountain God would play such foul tricks on me was disgusting. Making me not only hear but feel him in his absence, only to have nothing there when I turned. I felt a single sob rack my body. Making me shake forward, my face contorting and a choked noise of sorrow coming from my throat, and the it all spilled. I felt my body shaking violently in tremors of loss as the weight of the trick hand never moved from my shoulder where it never should have been. I kept on trying to choke back the sobs only to let a small, pathetic sounding cry to come out as my tears stained my cheeks. I took my left hand and reached up to my right shoulder where the phantom hand rested, laying it on top of nothing but my own shoulder, the weight now gone.

The cries truly came out now, I never knew how much even the apparition of Gin had affected me to the point of him being gone causing all efforts to choke out the sobs to disappear, leaving me weeping and sobbing as loud as I possibly could in the middle of the forest. I reached my hand up to my face and took the mask off, pulling it to my chest and going down to my knees with it. I held it close and rocked, not unlike any time I had done before thinking of Gin in my room. I had held my face in a pillow and held Gin's mask in my hands and fallen asleep, sometimes failing to wake up for school on my own in the morning.

I could feel the heat in my cheek where Gin had kissed me, though his lips had never actually touched my skin. I could feel the heat of the kiss until it actually _burned._ Where my face had rubbed against his neck when we'd finally hugged, his warm skin touching mine for the first time, not to be the last. It was when I knew he was still human, not only a spirit or an imaginary friend I'd made up. I dug the nails on my fingers into the palms of my hands until I'd bore small crescents into my skin, and screamed and cried until it hurt to swallow my own spit. Instead I screamed it away, not only screamed away the spit but screamed away the pain, the sadness, the anger, the frustration.

"Hotaru…"

"No!" I forced between sobs, "Y-you... you aren't real. You. Aren't. Him."

I didn't hear his voice or feel his touch again, left alone in this forest to cry. Just the way I liked to cry, alone, in peace.

My eyes had been plastered shut while I cried, but as I slowly went from sobbing to labored breathing and hiccups I opened my eyes. I was no longer in the forest, or I thought I wasn't, I couldn't tell. It was so dark I couldn't see the mask in my hands. I was beginning to scare myself, not knowing if somehow I'd been made blind, if this was another trick, a test of the mountain god. I carefully stood and felt my way to a solid object, which was no doubt stone. I felt up the rock, the jagged and rough surface damp.

Suddenly, my hand was dimly lit with a weak green light, the water in the stone reflecting the light and making bright spots on the stone pillar in front of me. I had confirmed that I was no longer in the forest, and I was definitely in some sort of cave. I turned to search for this eerie green light, and when I turned, there was a small flake of green. It was reminiscent of a firefly, but there was no bug, only this small piece of green light. It was a familiar green, a friendly green. I walked towards it and reached out my finger, but as soon as I had almost made contact with it, it disappeared, leaving the cave dark once again.

I looked around, searching for the small flake, mere seconds later, the cave lit up as if it were daylight, were the sun fluorescent green. I spun and saw a large line of the flakes, hovering in air. I walked up to the first, and when I reached for it, it disappeared and reappeared at the back of the line of flakes. I smiled and walked forwards, through the line of flakes, which seemed to warm me from the inside out every time I got close to one. It took me too long to realize why. The small fireflies were the same eerie green Gin had turned that fateful night three years ago.

I gave a light hearted smile, for the second time today, tears brimming my eyes. This time it was for a different reason, a better reason. I held his mask close and nuzzled my face against it, chuckling a bit into my arm as I continued to follow the lights, that seemed just that much brighter.

I wiped the tear from my eye, placing the mask over my face and continuing on, until I'd reached the exit of the cave. The last light was waiting for me there, wavering in the air. I crouched down in front of it, looking it over.

I whispered to it gently, "Thank You."

I then lifted the mask and blew the flake away, the light falling into oblivion once more. I smiled as I replaced the mask, standing and exiting the cave.

 _Impressive._

Boomed the sentinel of the forest.

 _No one has ever completed those tasks so fast._

"I had help." I responded.

 _I see, may your next challenge begin, and good luck._

I felt as if the Mountain God had begun to warm to my presence, even wishing me a good luck in his challenge. I continued on the path, walking another 100 metres at the least before coming across what must have been my next challenge. A stone altar was sitting in the middle of the path, beckoning me towards it. It was made of the same stone as the pillars at the entrance of the forest, Gin and I's meeting place. I still felt the spiritual pull on my soul towards the altar, seemingly begging me to come nearer.

I obliged, walking up to the stone altar and reaching out for it. The world around me was sucked away as I felt myself slip from consciousness.


End file.
